Monday, 23 March 2009

Paul Blart: Mall Cop Review

This is usually the type of film I avoid but as it stars Kevin James I thought I would give it a go. I have been a fan of his since his consistently hilarious role as ‘Doug Heffernan’ in ‘The King Of Queens’. Those of you not familiar with the series SHAME ON YOU!!!! GO HIDE SOMEWHERE!! DONT EVEN BOTHER THINKIN UP AN EXCUSE, JUST GO……WHY ARE YOU STILL READIN?? GETS-TA-GETTING!! MOVE ALREADY!! THATS IT IM COUNTING TO 5……..1……….2…………3………..4……….4 AND A HALF……hmmm i guess you had those parents too eh……you already know nothing happens when they’ve finished counting don't you….fine well….i guess you can stay. This film had many genuine LOL moments but it also had an overpowering amount of ‘haha…..hang on, this isn't even funny’ moments. Usually when I find certain parts boring in a film I would start counting popcorn kernels, but as I didn't have popcorn I counted the amount of burps I belched out, analysing how badly each one smelled of the Nando’s chicken I had eaten before. I'm not sure if you can judge the level of boring parts from my burp tally but there was 4. Kevin James has brilliant comedic timing but this is put to waste on the mediocre jokes and gags holding this film together. Now I'm not saying it was torture because believe me I am a fan of tearing into films that disappoint but at the same time it wasn't exactly impressive. One thing I am not a fan of is these comedies that ridicule a character beyond belief for comedic value. Films like ‘There’s Something About Mary’, ‘Punch-Drunk Love’ and ‘Meet The Parents’ where the lead character tries so hard to keep things normal and be happy but absolutely NOTHING goes their way until the end. Paul Blart is another example and I'm not saying there are not hilarious gems born from some of these type of situations but sometimes they go too far and its almost like watching someone being bullied for their lunch money…………AND I REALLY WANTED LUNCH THAT DAY!!! IT WAS CHEESEBURGER TUESDAY!!!…………oops……erm……………nah I'm playing, i was never bullied, which I still don't understand, I was a prime target, the round glasses, the computer interest, the oversized blazer, those bullies really missed out. Anyway I think I'll shut up now coz I'm pretty sure I can hear someone counting popcorn. To conclude, unless your a Kevin James fan this one can wait til its shown on TV.

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