Thursday, 31 January 2008

The Spiderwick Chronicles Review

First things first, when a movie has 'Spider' in the title I expect to see some spiders!!. What if 'Snakes on a plane' had no snakes!!, or what if 'There will be blood' had no blood!!? It should have been called, 'Fairies & the weird ogre things', mainly due to the fairies and weird ogre things in the film...doesnt take a genius, someone tell that to whoever came up with 'Quantum of Solace' for the next Bond film.
Any-who, the film was enjoyable, but what really rocked my boat was the animation. Some of the background CGI characters were really dodgy but the main CGI characters were very sexy!! well not in the actually meanin of the word but in a "OMG IM LOVIN IT!!! sort of way.
The story was ok, nothing special but pretty much what you would expect. The main attraction is the magical-ness that everyone over the age of 20 wants to remember. Worth the cinema ticket, not really one for the DVD collection........ok ok or the Blu Ray collection smart ass!!

Wednesday, 16 January 2008

Cloverfield Review

If lady liberty losing her head was the sacrifice for the birth of this magnificent film then I say off with the top of the Eifel tower, off with the hands of Big Ben, straighten up that tower of Pisa and let more great films come.The film is nothing like your typical 'Attack on America blockbuster', its not filled with corny one-liners, there is no hero with all the answers and is cliche-free. This film is genius in its simplicity, it has the balls (the story, not the monsters.....i never really saw if the monster had a pair or not) to not justify the monsters attack with some stupid far-fetched explanation. Any other movie would have a monsterologist who says something like "over there you can see a male monsterakious" and "due to global warming earth has become the perfect place for these monsters to give birth". Its simple, monsters are attacking, deal with it. The hand-held camera approach was refreshingly different although during many running moments made me feel as though I was on the titanic about to throw up all over Kate Winslet's exposed chest. Excellent movie, earned every one of its Empire given 5 star status......and for those who care, I think Jessica Lucas is a MEGABABE!!!

Wednesday, 9 January 2008

The Bucket List Review

It takes a lot of balls to do a film with this topic at Nicholson and Freeman's age. As if these two needed any more of my respect they went and took some more anyway.

This film is about 2 strangers who meet in hospital as they are both diagnosed with cancer, and with the few months left they have to live they decide to live out their dreams before they kick the bucket.

Both actors have reached a point in their career where they just don't have to try anymore because perfection comes naturally to them. Both performances where amazing and the chemistry between the two would make peanut butter and jelly consider marriage counseling.

A wonderful film, the only bad thing is the realization that these two heroes of film ARE actually getting on a bit (like Jackie Chan.....sniff sniff.........OH WHY CRUEL WORLD!!!! EVIL LORD OF TIME, DON'T LEAVE JACKIE SUBJECTED TO CARTOON REPRESENTATIONS AND STUPID WOOLWORTHS COMMERCIALS....sniff...HES GOT ANOTHER POLICE STORY IN HIM...I KNOW HE DOES!!...sniff..) sorry...erm....dunno what came over me....sniff....great film, a must see